None of us were born with the skills of emotional regulation. As infants, we experienced emotions that were very intense and raw, without the ability to soothe ourselves, or even understand what we are experiencing. What we needed and depended on was the guidance of our …
goes:
“Oh my God, I almost tripped over your shoes that you left out in the middle of the floor! You can be such a slob, Terry… can you think of other people and put your shoes away?!
I don’t hear that as my adult wife- I am a 4 year old and I am being screamed at by my father.
“If I insist on setting boundaries, he will leave me.” “ I can’t get into another fight right now, it easier to just put up with it and say nothing.” Sometimes it seems easier to sacrifice our boundaries than to risk losing the other person. This fear of abandonment leads us to …
What can we do when we’re already overwhelmed by intense emotions and cannot calm ourselves down? Not only does saying to ourselves “I’ve gotta calm down!” not seem to work, but we may find ourselves propelled further into a state of panic and powerlessness. First, it’s important that we acknowledge that thinking …
How to calm down when we feel overwhelmed by intense emotions? Read More »